satu cerita di hari selasa

Dah ptg ghupenye, rase cam cepat je ari nih berjalan. "betul ke dah ptg, rase cam baru je aku bgn dr tido", kata aku kpd kudin. "ko bgn pon dah pukul 2, mmg la rase kejap", balas kudin plak. hoh.....rupe2nye aku bgn kul 2, patut la rase kejap je *lol* . hmmm....ni sume penangan malam tadi la nih, kul 4 pg baru nak balik. kalu balik trus tido takpe la gak...nih bantai layan game dulu, last2 kul 7 pg baru aku tido. kui kui kui

sesambil tulis blog nih, aku pandang muka makhluk Allah kat tepi aku nih. aku pandang muke dier, dier pandang muke aku balik. makin comel plak aku tgk dier, geram je aku nengokkan. aku kira2 balik, dah setahun setengah aku ngan dier bersama.....sayang tul ngan dier. tetiba dier bersuara manja, hmmmm...takde lain la tu. "tucing, jom makan", kata aku kpd makhluk tadi. maka beriringan la kami turun ke dapur mencarik makanan.

tadi kudin baru je balik. dier kasi tau adik Faiz dah meninggal....kene denggi berdarah. erk.....terus terkedu aku dgr cite kudin, rase cam baru je smalam aku cakap2 ngan adik dier. Innnalillah, dah sampai masa dier. jap lagi mesti pergi rumah Faiz.

moja: bila dgr je org meninggal, semacam je aku rase.....hmmmmmm

alahai brontox !!!!! (kisah sedey seorg budak technical)

hmmm......masuk ari nih dah dekat 4 opis aku kene serang ngan menatang nih.....hangin satu badan aku. Clean satu pc, dier pegi lepak kat pc lain......clean pc tu plak, dier lepak kat pc sana lak. Dah mcm main polis sentri lak jadinye aku ngan virus nih. Last2 sampai masuk ke server aku, hadoi laaaaaaaaaa.......... dah jadi satu keje aku nak cleankan server plak. Nasib baik ader kengkawan aku yg kasi removal tool dier (tengkiu kengkawan sume), kalu x......buley jahannam masa depan aku wooooo ***sedey2***

So pas buat sedikit research, aku tgk virus nih akan buat sume program x leh bukak.....x cukup ngan tu, dier bley plak pegi disable antivirus sama regedit sampai x bley jalan budak 2 ekor nih. Giler jahat virus nih.....aku ingat kalu x mo gak clean pc2 kat opis aku nih, terpaksa la aku pakai solution F. so pesanan kpd pembuat virus nih:

"brengsek lu pembuat virus, awas kamu ya....tunggu aja pembalasan dr tuhan !!!"
(sampai bley cakap indonesia aku kui kui kui)

moja: tercabar sungguh kewibawaan aku sbg budak technical ari jumaat lepas.......

I'm Backkkkkkkkk !!!!!

Fuiyo...punye la lame aku tinggalkan activity memblogging nih. Bizi giler woooo.......al-maklum la, nak jadik Dato' dlm 5 tahun lagi (kunun2 nyer la)

So sempena the return of abg moja (abg moja la plak, kui kui kui) aku mau cite psl kepelikkan hati manusia.

Org tua2 slalu cakap, ikut hati mati...ikut rasa binasa. betul ke??? sebab setau aku, kalu kita ikut hati kengkadang hasil yg kite akan dapat superb. Ye la......kalu kita ikut kan akal kita, x selalunye akal kita akan bagi kita jawapan yg kite carik. Ni bukan sekadar cakap aku je.....ramai org yg aku tanye kate, kengkadang jawapan yg diorg carik tu dah ader depan mata. Tp sebab kita ikutkan logic akal, kita jadi tak nampak jawapan tu. Lagipon, tak sume jawapan yg kita carik perlukan kita fikir......aper yg kita perlu buat ialah bukak mata hati kita utk lihat satu2 perkara tu dr sudut pandangan yg lain.


moja: something for me to think........

Kesopanan Org Malaysia (Rencana sempena Bulan Merdeka)

aku slalu pikir apsal org malaysia nih suka maki org gunakan ayat yg tak elok. Aku tak maksudkan sume, tp most of us always use the dirty words hari2. Tak kira la nak marah org ke, nak puji org ke @ nak describe something. Tak pecaye ape aku cakap? Kite tgk contoh2 ayat yg nampak tak elok, tp kita gunakan jugak hari2. So kita mulakan ngan contoh 1.

Contoh satu:

Mamat jalan2 kat tepi sungai. Tetiba dier nampak ikan yg sgt besar. Tak berlengah lagi, dier terus lari balik rumah utk menceritakan penemuannye itu. Ditgh jalan dier terjumpe Abu.

Mamat: Abu, ko nak tau aper aku jumpe kat sungai tadi?
Abu : Ko jumpe aper Mat?
Mamat: Aku jumpe ikan besar giler sial.......seriously shit.

Contoh dua:

Adi datang lambat ke opis. Bila sampai di opis, dia dipanggil oleh bos dier.

Bos: Apsal ko dtg lambat?
Adi: Jam teruk tadi bos.
Bos: Aku pedulik aper.Mulai ari nih ko buley berambos. Bodo, stupid......dah tau jam kluar la rumah awal. Bodoh betul.

Contoh tiga:

Isam baru menamatkan pengajiannye ngan mendapat keputusan yg cemerlang. So bila dier balik, dier pon citer la kejayaan dier ngan kengkawan dier.

Kengkawan: kitorg dgr ko dah graduate.....
Isam : a'ah
Kengkawan: Baper pointer ko?
Isam : 3.9 je. Pandai giler babi kan aku.......(sambil belagak)
Kengkawan: Pandai sial......(sambil kagum)

Dgn tgk contoh2 yg aku kasi tu, terbukti org malaysia nih suka gunakan perkataan yg tak elok. Susah nak pecaye kan bila aku cakap org malaysia lagi kurang ajar dari org di barat? Bukan aku nak kutuk org kita, tapi tu la kenyataan nyer. Kalu korang tak caye gak, cuba lepak kat memane dan bukak pendengaran korang......bukan bukak mata je utk dicuci.

p/s: Nama yg aku pakai nih bukan nama sebenar.

moja: aper lagi nak kata?

mAlaYsiA's dRivErs

1. One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: IPOH driver

2. One hand on wheel, one hand out the window with cigarette: KEPONG driver.

3. One hand on wheel, one finger out window, cutting across all lanes of traffic: DOWNTOWN KUALA LUMPUR driver.

4. One hand on wheel, one hand on parang, foot solidly on accelerator: JOHOR driver.

5. One hand on wheel, one hand on non-fat double decaf cappuccino, cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator, hands-free on the lap: BANGSAR driver.

6. Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror: FOREIGNER, driving in MALAYSIA.

7. One hand on 12 oz. Double shot latte, one knee on wheel, talking on cellphone, foot on brake, mind on radio game, banging head on steering wheel while stuck in traffic: SUBANG JAYA DRIVER.....on the Federal Highway!!!

8. One hand on wheel, one hand on passengers head rest, alternating between both feet being on the accelerator and both feet on brake, throwing rambutans or durian shells out the window: KARAK HIGHWAY .... KUANTAN driver!

9. Four-wheel drive pick-up truck, READY-TO-KILL attitude, rear window stickers read "Make my day", beer cans on floor, wedding ribbon still attached to antenna: CONSTRUCTION SITE....PUCHONG driver!

10.One hand on the handphone, another hand picking nose, One leg on the dash board, another leg crossed on the seat with a beer can in the middle turning anywhere he likes, parking anywhere he likes, in fact, driving anywhere he likes. aaahhh ... this is a heaven for drivers ......welcome to PENANG!

11. Two hands gripping tightly to the wheel, eyes glued on the windscreen, alternately stepping on the accelerator and brakes every 5 seconds. WOMAN DRIVER!.......


moja: agak2 yg mana satu korang nih ye?

He vs She

HE: Can I buy you a drink?
SHE: Actually I'd rather have the money.

HE: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

HE: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

HE: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

HE: Your face must turn a few heads.
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
SHE: Okay, get out.

HE: I think I could make you very happy.
SHE: Why? Are you leaving?

HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: Why? Don't you already have one?

HE: Shall we go see a movie?
SHE: I've already seen it.

HE: Where have you been all my life?
SHE: Hiding from you.

HE: Haven't I seen you some place before?
SHE: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

HE: Is this seat empty?
SHE: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

HE: So, what do you do for a living?
SHE: I'm a female impersonator.

HE: Hey baby, what's your sign?
SHE: Do not enter.

HE: Your body is like a temple.
SHE: Sorry, there are no services today.

HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

HE: Where have you been all my life?
SHE: Where I'll be the rest of your life - in your wildest dreams

moja: ade ke perempuan camni?

SuwEy............

Penah tak korang rase cam nak tempeleng je sume org yg ader kat sekeliling korang? musti penah punye kan.......jgn nak tipu la. Cam tu la yg aku rase 4-5 ari nih. Sume mende yg aku buat tak menjadi...senang citer "suwey" la 4-5 hari nih.

Sumenyer "kesuweyran" start dari ari Ahad lepas. Camne la aku bley luper nak amik awek aku kat airport? Pastu sampai ari nih dier tanak angkat call or jumpe aku. Besar sgt ke salah aku tu? Pada awek aku, kalu U baca blog nih......I bebetul sorry. Takde niat pon nak biar U tunggu sampai 3 jam kat airport.......

Pastu ari Selasa.......penat je aku bgn pepagi buta pasal nak kena jaga BULATS test kat Sentral. Sampai2 je budak Jamil tu kasi tau aku yg BULATS test utk ari tu tak jadi............hampeh. Buat penat je pegi Sentral.

Pastu ari nih....lagi suwey. Aku dgn penuh semangat nak pegi keje. Dah siap hensem2, kluar nak start moto je tgk aku nyer tayar blakang sudah pancit. Hilang trus semangat aku nak pegi keje. Tak pikir byk...terus je aku masuk umah balik sambung tido...hahahahaha. Puas hati aku.

moja: kalo sok suwey gak ari aku, aku ingat nak pegi mandi bunga la............