Kesopanan Org Malaysia (Rencana sempena Bulan Merdeka)

aku slalu pikir apsal org malaysia nih suka maki org gunakan ayat yg tak elok. Aku tak maksudkan sume, tp most of us always use the dirty words hari2. Tak kira la nak marah org ke, nak puji org ke @ nak describe something. Tak pecaye ape aku cakap? Kite tgk contoh2 ayat yg nampak tak elok, tp kita gunakan jugak hari2. So kita mulakan ngan contoh 1.

Contoh satu:

Mamat jalan2 kat tepi sungai. Tetiba dier nampak ikan yg sgt besar. Tak berlengah lagi, dier terus lari balik rumah utk menceritakan penemuannye itu. Ditgh jalan dier terjumpe Abu.

Mamat: Abu, ko nak tau aper aku jumpe kat sungai tadi?
Abu : Ko jumpe aper Mat?
Mamat: Aku jumpe ikan besar giler sial.......seriously shit.

Contoh dua:

Adi datang lambat ke opis. Bila sampai di opis, dia dipanggil oleh bos dier.

Bos: Apsal ko dtg lambat?
Adi: Jam teruk tadi bos.
Bos: Aku pedulik aper.Mulai ari nih ko buley berambos. Bodo, stupid......dah tau jam kluar la rumah awal. Bodoh betul.

Contoh tiga:

Isam baru menamatkan pengajiannye ngan mendapat keputusan yg cemerlang. So bila dier balik, dier pon citer la kejayaan dier ngan kengkawan dier.

Kengkawan: kitorg dgr ko dah graduate.....
Isam : a'ah
Kengkawan: Baper pointer ko?
Isam : 3.9 je. Pandai giler babi kan aku.......(sambil belagak)
Kengkawan: Pandai sial......(sambil kagum)

Dgn tgk contoh2 yg aku kasi tu, terbukti org malaysia nih suka gunakan perkataan yg tak elok. Susah nak pecaye kan bila aku cakap org malaysia lagi kurang ajar dari org di barat? Bukan aku nak kutuk org kita, tapi tu la kenyataan nyer. Kalu korang tak caye gak, cuba lepak kat memane dan bukak pendengaran korang......bukan bukak mata je utk dicuci.

p/s: Nama yg aku pakai nih bukan nama sebenar.

moja: aper lagi nak kata?

mAlaYsiA's dRivErs

1. One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: IPOH driver

2. One hand on wheel, one hand out the window with cigarette: KEPONG driver.

3. One hand on wheel, one finger out window, cutting across all lanes of traffic: DOWNTOWN KUALA LUMPUR driver.

4. One hand on wheel, one hand on parang, foot solidly on accelerator: JOHOR driver.

5. One hand on wheel, one hand on non-fat double decaf cappuccino, cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator, hands-free on the lap: BANGSAR driver.

6. Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror: FOREIGNER, driving in MALAYSIA.

7. One hand on 12 oz. Double shot latte, one knee on wheel, talking on cellphone, foot on brake, mind on radio game, banging head on steering wheel while stuck in traffic: SUBANG JAYA DRIVER.....on the Federal Highway!!!

8. One hand on wheel, one hand on passengers head rest, alternating between both feet being on the accelerator and both feet on brake, throwing rambutans or durian shells out the window: KARAK HIGHWAY .... KUANTAN driver!

9. Four-wheel drive pick-up truck, READY-TO-KILL attitude, rear window stickers read "Make my day", beer cans on floor, wedding ribbon still attached to antenna: CONSTRUCTION SITE....PUCHONG driver!

10.One hand on the handphone, another hand picking nose, One leg on the dash board, another leg crossed on the seat with a beer can in the middle turning anywhere he likes, parking anywhere he likes, in fact, driving anywhere he likes. aaahhh ... this is a heaven for drivers ......welcome to PENANG!

11. Two hands gripping tightly to the wheel, eyes glued on the windscreen, alternately stepping on the accelerator and brakes every 5 seconds. WOMAN DRIVER!.......


moja: agak2 yg mana satu korang nih ye?

He vs She

HE: Can I buy you a drink?
SHE: Actually I'd rather have the money.

HE: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

HE: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

HE: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

HE: Your face must turn a few heads.
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
SHE: Okay, get out.

HE: I think I could make you very happy.
SHE: Why? Are you leaving?

HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: Why? Don't you already have one?

HE: Shall we go see a movie?
SHE: I've already seen it.

HE: Where have you been all my life?
SHE: Hiding from you.

HE: Haven't I seen you some place before?
SHE: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

HE: Is this seat empty?
SHE: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

HE: So, what do you do for a living?
SHE: I'm a female impersonator.

HE: Hey baby, what's your sign?
SHE: Do not enter.

HE: Your body is like a temple.
SHE: Sorry, there are no services today.

HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

HE: Where have you been all my life?
SHE: Where I'll be the rest of your life - in your wildest dreams

moja: ade ke perempuan camni?

SuwEy............

Penah tak korang rase cam nak tempeleng je sume org yg ader kat sekeliling korang? musti penah punye kan.......jgn nak tipu la. Cam tu la yg aku rase 4-5 ari nih. Sume mende yg aku buat tak menjadi...senang citer "suwey" la 4-5 hari nih.

Sumenyer "kesuweyran" start dari ari Ahad lepas. Camne la aku bley luper nak amik awek aku kat airport? Pastu sampai ari nih dier tanak angkat call or jumpe aku. Besar sgt ke salah aku tu? Pada awek aku, kalu U baca blog nih......I bebetul sorry. Takde niat pon nak biar U tunggu sampai 3 jam kat airport.......

Pastu ari Selasa.......penat je aku bgn pepagi buta pasal nak kena jaga BULATS test kat Sentral. Sampai2 je budak Jamil tu kasi tau aku yg BULATS test utk ari tu tak jadi............hampeh. Buat penat je pegi Sentral.

Pastu ari nih....lagi suwey. Aku dgn penuh semangat nak pegi keje. Dah siap hensem2, kluar nak start moto je tgk aku nyer tayar blakang sudah pancit. Hilang trus semangat aku nak pegi keje. Tak pikir byk...terus je aku masuk umah balik sambung tido...hahahahaha. Puas hati aku.

moja: kalo sok suwey gak ari aku, aku ingat nak pegi mandi bunga la............

diVinE cReaTuRe..........

"The skies twist and thunder roars, signaling the coming of the ancient creature, and the dawn of true power"

moja: motif post nih? ntah la........

The Red vs Rossoneri

Ini mlm mari kite reramai celikkan mata pasal pagi nih Liverpool lwn AC Milan, final Champions League. Nampaknye terpaksa la aku sokong AC Milan pasal Arsenal dah out awal2 lagi (ini bukan belot tau). Agak2 korang la sape yg menang? Pepehal pon jgn lupe tgk. Tak tau bile? Haaa.......korang tgk info kat bwh nih.

Liverpool vs AC Milan

0200 am, 26/05/05

TV3& ESPN

moja: Liverpool musti kalahnyer Pearl. Baik ko join aku sokong AC Milan. hahahahahahaha

oRigiN

Ade sesape penah baca comic nih? Kalo korang kipas-susah-mati Wolverine........menipu la kalo korang tak tau pasal comic nih. Btw.....kalo korang nak tau, harga comic nih skang kat US ialah US$ 300 utk setiap keping. So kalo korang ader kesemua series, pastu korang jual.......korang akan dapat US$ 1800 (+/- RM 5,400). Tapi reger nih utk comic original je tau, bukan Tradepaper Pack (TP). Cuba korang bayangkan......korang beli ngan reger RM 12 sekeping ( RM 72 utk 6 keping) tp korang dapat jual balik dgn reger RM 5,400. Mmg berbaloi kan?

moja: Sebenarnye aku menyesal giler pasal tak beli comic nih waktu dier memule kluar dulu. hu hu hu hu hu

Song for a friend.................

Patience ( Guns N Roses )

Shed a tear 'cause I'm missin' you
I'm still alright to smile
Girl, I think about you every day now

Was a time when I wasn't sure
But you set my mind at ease
There is no doubt
You're in my heart now

Said, woman, take it slow
It'll work itself out fine
All we need is just a little patience

Said, sugar, make it slow
And we come together fine
All we need is just a little patience (patience)

Mm, yeah

I sit here on the stairs'
Cause I'd rather be alone
If I can't have you right now
I'll wait, dear

Sometimes I get so tense
But I can't speed up the time
But you know, love
There's one more thing to consider

Said, woman, take it slow
And things will be just fine
You and I'll just use a little patience

Said, sugar, take the time'
Cause the lights are shining bright
You and I've got what it takes
To make it, We won't fake it,
I'll never break it'cause I can't take it

Little patience, mm yeah, mm yeah
Need a little patience, yeah just a little patience,
Yeah some more patience,
Yeah need some patience, Yeah could use some patience, Yeah gotta have some patience,
Yeah all it takes is patience, just a little patience is all you need

* I been walkin' the streets at night
Just tryin' to get it right
Hard to see with so many around
you know I dont like being stuck in the crowd
and the streets dont change but baby the name
I ain't got time for the game 'cause I need you
Yeah, yeah, but I need you ooo, I need you
Whoa, I need you ooo, All this time **


In memories:
along
(1982 - 2005)

moja: This song 4 ya long. Rest in peace coz u deserved it dude.......